“Does this dress make my butt look big?”
You know it’s her favorite dress but you could never really stand it and quite frankly it isn’t very flattering to her beautiful form. What is a man to do? An intelligent man dodges the question….”I like the blue one better!” An intelligent woman won’t pursue the first line of questioning.
When presented with such questions and Cosmo and Facebook quizzes, there are several ways to go…one–tell the complete brutal truth, no matter how close to mealtime or bedtime or how you think you can sugarcoat it; two–answer lovingly and expectantly, probably with a few little white lies thrown in, as we are taught by the romance novels and chick flicks; three–misdirection, subterfuge and avoidance. Apparently pleading the fifth is acceptable in our legal system but not in a marriage. If you know of a fourth option, I’m listening!
I usually pick door number two because I love my wife and quite frankly because I like to eat the meals she cooks and sleep in the same bed!
Raising children and being married are wonderful joys (most of the time, hopefully) in many of our lives. We know, however, that lying is a sin and sin leads to death, but white lies seem to be instrumental to the survival of a relationship. If you do the math for salvation, factoring in the variables of marriage, children, repentance and sin (white lies), it’s like a bad calculus equation that I’m not sure I want to try and figure out. Thank God that the answer always comes out “grace.”
I know I can’t argue with the Bible, but white lies seem to keep the peace, bolster our children’s confidence, keep the romance alive and keep friendships afloat at the very least. We’ve all heard the old adage, “If mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” It defies logic that someone could remain married, with or without children, without dropping a single white lie during his or her many years of bliss. I think that kind of brutality or evasiveness would lead to too many divorces and kids in therapy! I thank God for His example and mostly for His grace. But let’s try not to abuse it!